Examination of Conscience was conceived in the fall of 2009. After moving to Portland, Oregon I came across a few old diaries I had kept in high school. Upon reading these once important moments, I began to consider them in the spectrum of my life. While they were long past and forgotten, reading through my intimate thoughts, made me quite uncomfortable. My first instinct was to burn them, my second, to read them in front of a camera. These feelings that were only ever confided to a pen and paper, needed to be verbally spoken and shared. Sitting in my empty living room on my golden yellow chair, I began performing for an unknown audience. Deeply inspired by story telling and the act of confessing in church, I saw these performances as a way to reconstruct my past. Having never mastered a functional relationship, I wondered if the consolation I was looking for might be found in these forgotten diaries.
The video series is compiled of 60 videos that can all be found on Vimeo. It also took the form of a live performance for the end of term BFA reviews in the fall of 2009. In the performance I read from several diary entries while sitting on the same yellow couch that was in my apartment. The performance was also accompanied by a letterpressed confession. In order to express my anxiety of doing my first live performance, something I related to being in your first relationship.
Watch all 60 videos at https://vimeo.com/user2062831/videos